Why is it that so many of us struggle to say what we really feel, especially when things get difficult?
Here are some tips to help you to handle that dreaded conversation:
- Learn the language of the organisation–others will “hear” you better.
- If you are in an industry where speed is of priority eg trading in shares, stocks or constantly needing to meet tight deadlines – you may need to be blunt to be efficient eg: “ No, that will not work at all”. However if you are in an organisation that has a “softer–more nurturing” approach to business you will need to be more diplomatic. Eg “Here’s how I would like to add on to your idea”.
- Plan ahead what you want to say, have a couple of key points. Rehearse the conversation in your head especially how you plan to start.
- Try and speak a little slower than is your norm, keep your voice level and remember to breathe. Speaking too quickly lacks impact, makes you appear flustered and breathless merely adding to your stress levels. We should concentrate on modulating the pitch of our voice – nerves and emotions tend to make your voice high and squeaky.
- If you get emotional – back off. Little will be achieved until you have controlled your emotions. Take a deep breath and retire gracefully: “Please give me a few moments, what I need to say to you is important”.
- Don’t loose track of what it was you needed to say, but take this opportunity to see if you have been heard and understood. So many misunderstandings can be prevented if you take a step back, assess, reassess and then if necessary change your track rather than ploughing full steam ahead.
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