If we lived in a different world, people would judge us on our experience, hard work, loyalty. Research has proven the reality to be that we are placed in “categories” within the first 30 seconds of meeting someone. Instinctively we assess, best guess and visually undress each other in this short time. If you are not able to present yourself fast and powerfully you will be overlooked
We are all aware of how important creating a Powerful First Impression is. What can you do if you didn’t get it quite right? Do we get a second chance? What do you do if you mess up? Mistakes do happen to the best of us. It doesn’t matter if the error was small or monumental. How are you going to fix it?
Negative Impressions
Common Turnoffs to Avoid ...
* Fumbling with paperwork
* Looking up at clock, checking watch continuously
* Fiddling with jewellery
* Clicking your pen repeatedly
* Examining or playing with your hair
* Chewing gum – makes you appear as if you don’t take things seriously
* Eating at your desk, whilst you are walking, during a meeting
* Yawning, moaning, whistling
* Shouting, laughing loudly in open plan environment
* Cuddly toys, amusing slogans, pictures around your work area
* Dirty nails, bad breath, body odour
* Complaining about a hangover
* Telling racist, sexist jokes
* Chewing fingernails, cracking knuckles
* Conversing in front of others in a language not understood by them
How to recover
and land back on your feet
Oh no it’s happened! You’ve messed up at work or despite your best efforts you’ve made a terrible impression. Don’t despair you are more often than not judged on how you recover than on your initial mistake
Here are damage control strategies which will allow you to show your face in the office again and possibly end up looking better than you did to begin with.
The Costly / Career Limiting Mistake
* Correcting the situation takes priority. Forget saving face here. Do whatever it takes to fix what has occurred.
* Apologise to all concerned. Keep the apology short and sincere
* Highlight how you have corrected the situation, as well as procedures you have put into place to avoid a repeat
* NEVER try passing the buck as you stand to alienate your fellow colleagues and serve only to label yourself as untrustworthy
* DON’T make a joke of the situation as this gives the impression that you don’t really care that you have messed up
* Move on, rehashing the episode keeps your mistake upper most in the minds of others and damages your reputation further
Goodbye First Impression
It happens to us all, e.g. you try too hard and come across as gushy or aggressive; you forget your bosses name when introducing a new colleague. You are convinced you have made a bad first impression. People’s first assumptions or gut reactions to you taints how they see you from then on and will flavour all further interactions they have with you. It may take some time to overcome their preconceptions, but you can help matters along...
Reflect on the interaction
Are you happy that you were reflecting the real you? If the answer is yes, it might just be a bad personality fit and possibly you may never choose to form a connection with this person. Remember it is impossible to please or be liked by everyone.
“We will discover the nature of our particular genius when we stop trying to conform to our own or to other people’s models, learn to be ourselves and allow our natural channel to open”
– Shakti Gawain
Correcting a Negative Impression
The Direct Approach – Pre–empting a Bad Impression
Some situations may make you feel uncomfortable eg meeting new people or giving a presentation. Identifying these helps prepare you for them. Perhaps warning the person you are dealing with “Please excuse me I get a little tongue tied when meeting new people” will certainly ease your and their discomfort
Stopping the negative in its tracks
* If you feel the situation is going off course or that the interaction is not going well, back off and try and get things back on track.
* Focusing on what the other person thinks and feels is often the way to deal with this e.g. use more “you” words rather than “I” or “me” eg “How do YOU view the situation?”
* Make sure that your body language is in sync with your message, use open gestures, make good eye contact, nod and lean towards the person
The Post Impression Bandage
* If there was no specific reason why the interaction didn’t go well a general “My apologies our first meeting didn’t go smoothly” Be honest.
* People are often very forgiving when you show awareness of your impact on them This approach only works if you follow through and deliver on your promises
The Indirect Approach
Time is a great healer and as long as your subsequent behaviour and interactions are positive you may be able to outweigh your original negative impression. This however does imply that you will have enough opportunities to change the initial impression. Showing respect and paying a little extra attention as long as it is sincere, will go along way in remedying a painful situation
Learning from the experience and being more self–aware is vital in preventing you from making a negative first impression blunder again. Try not to make the same mistake again!
To guarantee that your first impressions is a memorable and lasting one contact us
Tel: 011 469 1396
Fax: 0866 140 205
Email: haydee@profimpressions.co.za
www.profimpressions.co.za
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